Merry Little Christmas Page 3
“Baby?”
“I… I just don’t know what to say.” She wiped at her eyes and he realized a couple of tears had escaped.
“You don’t like the idea?”
“No. I don’t.” She threw her arms around him suddenly, “I love the idea! Thank you! Thank you!”
“Yeah?”
“Yes. You are so amazing and thoughtful and generous and I am so lucky. I love you. Yes!” She peppered his face with kisses, “Yes, we’ll name him Carter.”
“Carter West?” He grinned.
She nodded, “Carter West.”
“I love it.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.” She hugged him again and he held her close.
Carter West. They’d just named their unborn son. If life got better than this, he wasn’t sure how.
“You know…” She pulled back with another goofy grin on her face, “We still have to choose a middle name and your brothers are going to fight it out for naming rights on that one.”
He chuckled because she was right. She knew them well. The fact that Maddie had lost a bet and named one of the twins after Riley had been hilarious but also sweet. Devin hadn’t even argued over it though everyone had expected him to. Now, naming rights was a big deal with all three brothers claiming they should be the next to get a namesake. She was right and Riley and Devin would no doubt fight it out for the right to their son’s middle name.
“I can’t wait.”
She laughed, “I can. Let’s hold off telling them until after Christmas okay?”
“If that’s what you want.”
“I just want you Zach. You and little Carter.” She kissed him again, “I love you both so much. Thank you again for this amazing gift. I can’t imagine anything I could love more.”
He smiled, “Except maybe your cookies?”
“You and cookies and Carter.” She nodded, “Best Christmas ever.”
“Merry Christmas baby-doll.”
Devin & Maddie: Silent Night
“And then they lived happily ever after.”
Maddie smiled up at him from where she was tucked in bed with their daughter and Devin felt his heart squeeze tight in his chest. This was love. This feeling of absolute and utter contentment was his reason for getting up in the morning, for breathing, for being.
If anyone had told him a couple of years ago when he walked into that backwoods bar to keep an eye on the girl his brothers treated like a beloved little sister that he would end up here, he would have laughed in their face. The very idea of him being the kind of man that could settle down and get married and raise children had been laughable back then. It would have been even more impossible to imagine that little Maddie McBride was the woman that would steal his heart.
Back then, he’d been the bad seed of what their small hometown of Fate had dubbed the Wild West Boys. Zach had been the older responsible brother. Riley had been the younger carefree brother. He had been neither responsible nor carefree. He’d been weighed down by decades of hurt and guilt and pain because he had been the only one of them there when their father suffered the heart attack that killed him and he’d thought he was to blame.
Maddie had been the one to see through it, to help him work through it, because she loved him. Her goodness, her light had been the thing to save him. She was the reason that he had finally been able to put the past behind him, the reason he had been able to move forward with his life. She was the reason he had finally grown up and become the man he was meant to be.
A husband. A damn good husband. A father. A hell of a good father. He still fought his demons some days, still had his doubts and he’d added a hundred new fears to his list with the births of each of his children, but now he knew that he didn’t have to face any of it alone.
He had Maddie. The woman he’d loved for as long as he could remember. The woman he would love with his very last breath.
He watched as she put the children’s book aside and attempted to climb out of the bed without waking their oldest daughter. She was tiny enough that she managed to fit into the small bed with no trouble and she easily slipped her arm out from beneath the little girl. She pulled the blanket up and tucked her in and Ellie never moved. She’d been asleep since halfway through the book.
He swallowed a chuckle when she carefully removed the crown their daughter had begun wearing during her every waking moment and then rolled her eyes at him. The crown was a present from her Uncle Riley who insisted on calling her Princess Ellison. He’d convinced his niece that she was royalty and should always get her way. It was a problem Devin saw having for the next sixteen to thirty years or so and he’d all but threatened his younger brothers’ life if he started the same trend with the twins.
“I’m going to kill Riley for giving her that tiara.” Maddie hissed as she snuck out of the room.
“I was just thinking the same thing.” He kept his voice to a whisper as she pulled the door shut behind them.
“She loves the princess and the pea book though. She swears it’s about her. Made me look for the pea before she’d crawl into bed. I didn’t think she was ever going to go to sleep tonight.”
He chuckled, “Really? Because it looked to me like she went straight down. Mommy’s the one that kept reading right to the end.”
His wife love to read, one of a million things he’d learned and loved about her. There were books lining the bookshelves in the living room. Books lining the shelves in Ellie’s room too. And if the house was ever quiet, a rarity these days, he knew he could find Maddie curled up somewhere with a book in her hands.
She was a dream. A believer. And since she’d believed in him, he had every intention of making all of her dreams come true.
Maddie lifted her chin defiantly, “It’s a good ending.”
“Yeah. It is.” He circled her in his arms, “I like our story better though.”
“Mmm, me too.” She tiptoed up and brushed her mouth against his before dropping back to her heels, “I need to check on the twins.”
Devin nodded and released her from his hold, taking her hand as they made their way down the hall together. He’d just checked on the girls but he knew there was no use telling his wife that. She was a mother and she worried constantly. Even if he told her that they were in their cribs, happy and asleep with dreams of sugarplum fairies, she would insist on seeing them for herself. And he didn’t blame her because he was the same way, always doing one last check before he shut the lights off and went to bed to ensure all was well with his girls.
Maddie paused in the doorway of the nursery and he moved in behind her, wrapping his arms around her. She twisted one of her hands in his, twining their fingers. He squeezed and she sighed and leaned back into him.
“They’re perfect aren’t they?”
He smiled and lowered his mouth to her ear, “Of course they are, just like their mom.”
“I don’t know about that.” Maddie tugged him with her as she crossed to the cribs, “See there, see that little furrow between her brows?”
“She looks like she’s scowling in her sleep.” He whispered back.
“Yeah. I think Avery takes after her daddy.”
He pinched her playfully, “Funny.”
“I thought so.”
He watched his youngest daughter sleep and couldn’t help but feel his heart warm in his chest. She was going to be his fighter. She had been from the very beginning. Her sister had come out to greet world with a big ol’ smile on her face but not Avery. She’d been determined to stay right where she was and when she had finally come into the world a full hour later she’d been pissed. Red and angry and wailing at the top of her lungs, she’d fought everything they tried to give her and everyone that held her.
Except for him, she’d fallen asleep in his arms that first night and captured his heart forever.
So maybe Maddie was right. He wasn’t supposed to love any of his children more than the others and he didn’t. He swore they
all owned him, body and soul. But he did love them all differently. He loved Ellie because she was funny and bossy and impossibly arrogant for a toddler. He loved Olivia because she was sweet and cuddly and easygoing despite the chaos her twin caused. And he loved Avery because she reminded him of himself.
Strange how much he already identified with a tiny little baby girl. But he did. She was going to be the one to watch out for. Ellie might rule the world and Olivia could very well run it but it would be Avery that set it on fire.
In a lot of ways, he thought each of his daughters reminded him a little of him and his brothers. As the oldest, Ellie had a lot of the same traits as Zach. She could be impatient and demanding but she already looked out for her younger sisters, always asking if mommy and daddy needed her help taking care of them. And, much like her namesake, Olivia was smart and resourceful but clearly opinionated just like Riley. So it only figured that Avery would have to be the one most like him.
Which scared the hell out of him. Because his life had not been easy or peaceful or even all that successful. Not until he gave in to his feelings for Maddie. And he wanted his daughter to have an easy life, a happy life, without the weight of the loss he and his brothers had faced.
The old fear, the one that he had struggled with as long as he could remember, threatened to strangle him at the thought but he took Maddie’s hand and squeezed. She moved into him, leaning against him, supporting him in the unquestionable way that only she could. And the panic passed, or at least it went back to the reasonable, livable level that he dealt with on a daily basis.
He couldn’t guarantee that he would always be there for his kids. Life didn’t come with guarantees. Everyone died and they didn’t get to choose their time. But he could do his best to be there for them every day that he had, to love them with everything he had and give them everything that he was. His own father had done that much and even if he had died too early, he was still the best man Devin had ever known and the one man he most wanted to be like.
“Babe?”
“Hmm?” He realized he’d gotten lost in thought, staring down at his beautiful daughter and turned his attention back to his wife.
“I said we should go to bed.” Maddie tugged on his hand as she backed towards the door.
He sighed as he followed her, “You’re probably right. They’re all sleeping which is a rare occurrence. We should try to get some sleep too. Go on and I’ll be right behind you.”
“Okay.”
He watched as his wife disappeared down the dark hallway and then went back into the nursery. He paused by the door to check that the nightlights were still plugged in and working. He took a moment to check the baby monitors as well. Ellie had a tendency to play with the things like they were walkie talkies, another bad habit her Uncle Riley had taught her, so he always checked that they were in place and tuned to the correct frequency before going to bed. Since everything was in its place and the house was quiet, he headed towards his bedroom.
“I was thinking tomo...” Devin came to an abrupt halt just inside the doorway, the rest of his sentence completely forgotten.
Maddie hadn’t gone to bed like he’d expected her to. She hadn’t changed out of her clothes and crawled between the sheets. She hadn’t pulled on the tank top and pajama bottoms he sometimes let her get away with wearing when it was cold outside. She wasn’t already half-asleep and snoring slightly like the exhausted mother of three he knew her to be.
Instead, she stood just at the foot of their bed. She had changed, but not into pajamas. She wasn’t wearing lingerie, not really, because Maddie wasn’t the type to ever go with lace and frills. She had changed into her pink bra, the one she knew he liked because it cupped her breasts like petals just waiting to be peeled away, and a matching pair of barely there panties. Her dark hair fell around her shoulders where she’d pulled it from its ponytail and if he wasn’t mistaken, she’d dabbed something equally pink and shiny on her lips.
His cock immediately came awake. Thoughts of sleep evaporated. He could barely think straight and suddenly it had nothing to do with being tired.
“Maddie?”
“I lost you for a minute in there, in the nursery. I could see you just up and disappear on me. Lost in your thoughts, in your worries.”
He equally loved and hated that she could read him so well. Even after all of this time, after building a life together, creating a family together, he couldn’t shake the old fear that said that he would screw it up and lose everything that mattered most to him. He hated that he could still hurt her by doubting their future and he loved that she was strong enough to call him on his bullshit now.
“I’m sorry I…”
“But you reached for me.” She cut him off with a shake of her head, “You were drowning and you reached for me, just like we talked about, just like you promised you would.”
“I’ll always reach for you sweetheart. You’re my lifeline. You know that.” He moved towards her.
“I do. I know. And you’re mine. I love you Devin.”
“I love you too.” He paused directly in front of her, “While we’re being honest, you’re naked and it’s really hard for me to focus on this discussion you seem intent on having right about now.”
She smiled at that, “Nothing left to discuss. I just wanted you to know that I saw what happened in there and tell you that I love you.”
“I love you too.” He reiterated, his eyes automatically drifting down to her mouth, “I thought we were going to sleep?”
“I said we should go to bed. I never said a thing about sleep.” She stepped closer, close enough her breasts brushed his chest when she twined her arms around his neck, “All three of our daughters are asleep at the exact same time. I think we should take advantage of this moment alone. Don’t you?”
God he loved this woman. Smart and sexy and his. He’d been in love with the girl for a long time. He’d loved the woman he married. He was in love with the woman she’d become, a wife and mother. Strong and confidant and unafraid of her own mind and body and sexuality. He just loved her.
“What did you have in mind?” He slipped his arms around her waist.
“Something dirty.”
He chuckled at that, “Oh, do tell…”
He particularly loved it when she said things like that. Because his wife liked his kinky side. Because not only did she like it, but she liked to get in the dirt and roll around with him. And when it was her idea, it was always, hands-down, the most mind-blowing sex of his life. Every damned time.
“I was thinking...” She chewed her bottom lip in that adorably shy way of hers even as she met his gaze, “Do you remember the first time you spanked me?”
His cock attempted to break through the zipper on his jeans. Remember one of the best days of his life? Yeah, he remembered. He remembered everything where this woman was concerned.
He remembered that they’d been having a fight about something stupid he had said. He remembered she’d thrown a book at his head and that it was her parents who had picked it up because he’d been busy screwing Maddie senseless in the other room. He remembered that when she’d submitted her body to him he’d realized that he was falling head over heels in love with her and that there was nothing he could do to stop it.
His throat felt tight again so he nodded.
“You said something that day I’ve been thinking about for a while now and I thought… well, it is Christmas so… maybe it could be like a present to both of us.”
He had no idea what she was getting at. He’d said a lot of shit that day. Hell, he still said a lot of shit when he was trying to get inside her tight little body. He’d figured out early that his woman liked his dirty mouth and he used it to his full advantage, usually going into explicit detail about just what he wanted and how she felt.
He couldn’t for the life of him figure out what he could have said that day that would have made her think about it for so long without saying something already. They’d d
one just about anything and everything the Kama Sutra could come up with and a few things that even those people couldn’t have imagined. He didn’t think there was anything that they hadn’t tried or at least talked about trying at some point.
“I…”
“Don’t remember.” She smiled again, “That’s okay Dev. I’d be happy to remind you.”
He watched as she licked her lips and then stepped back from him. He wasn’t happy about letting her go but he did it. She seemed to be on some sort of mission and it was still rare enough when Maddie took control in the bedroom that he felt the need to let her see it through. The bedroom had been and would always be his domain. They’d agreed on that when they started their relationship and that hadn’t changed. He was dominant but sometimes, occasionally, it was fun to switch roles. So he let her back away from him even as he tried to figure out what she was up to.
God she was pretty. He took the opportunity to memorize every inch of her all over again. She wasn’t the same girl he’d seen naked for the first time in almost identical pink panties. She’d been pretty then too but now that he knew every curve, every valley, every sensitive point and ticklish spot, he thought she was absolutely flawless.
After the birth of the twins, she’d complained that her body would never look the same again and he’d spent many, many hours since convincing her that he loved it all the same. She was more curvaceous. There was no denying that. Her breasts were larger and more sensitive, definitely a bonus, and her hips were wider and more womanly creating the most alluring hourglass figure. He’d liked her body before but this one, the one that he’d helped mold with the creation of their children, it was the body that he ached for.
“Dev?”
He jerked his eyes back to hers to see humor and mischief dancing there, “Huh?”
“I said…” She paused for dramatic effect, her dark lashes nearly obscuring her eyes when she looked down and then back up at him, “You told me that someday I would let you do whatever you wanted with me. Anything you wanted. Everything you wanted. I believe there was mention of tying me up so I was at your mercy.”